


This Must Be My Dream

by ObscureReference



Series: TFW [3]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: (briefly) - Freeform, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Explicit Sexual Content, In a way, M/M, Other, Past Injury, Polyamory, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-04
Updated: 2016-03-04
Packaged: 2018-05-24 15:33:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6158284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObscureReference/pseuds/ObscureReference
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chowder gets a clue.</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Must Be My Dream

**Author's Note:**

> I started this series before Shitty ever gave Lardo his dibs and it was too late to go back, so we're going to pretend this takes place in a universe where Lardo is rooming with some art friends instead. Whoops. 
> 
> This is really long and I read through it as best as I could to proofread, but if I missed anything, tell me and I will fix it immediately. I also wrote it majorly out of order. I hope I didn't miss anything in that regard. Tell me if I need to tag anything. 
> 
> To everyone who waited so long for this final part, I'm sorry. And thank you for your patience. I hope you enjoy.
> 
> Title taken from the 1975 song by the same name. Because I was listening to it earlier.

_Then_

At age twelve, Derek Nurse hopped down the front steps of his brownstone, tripped over the loose shoelace on his right foot, and promptly broke his left arm as he tumbled down the remaining steps.

His mother, waiting for him on the sidewalk and marveling at her son's inability to stay upright anywhere except on the ice, took one look at the tears gathering in Derek's eyes and swept him off to the hospital.

Let it never be said Derek Nurse did anything in halves.

It took over an hour to get an x-ray, by which time Derek's arm had already started swelling. As busy as New York doctors were, they hadn't given him anything for the pain, and Derek was forced to wait in the hard plastic lobby chairs and sniff wetly into his mother's side just like everybody else.

"Oh, honey," his mother sighed, threading her long fingers through his hair. She combed her hands through the curls, and Derek could almost distract himself from the pain by focusing on the way she moved instead.

"Oh," his mother said again, looking down at him. "You are going to give your soulmate a run for their money."

It was the first time Derek had ever heard the word soulmate; at least, it was the first time he'd ever heard the word soulmate applied to _him._

Other people had soulmates, like Katherine Berkley and Katherine Hopkins in the class across from his who claimed they were best-friend soulmates on account of their shared name and how they "just knew."

Some people married their soulmates. Usually it worked out. Unless you were a celebrity who claimed you were marrying your soulmate and then got divorced because it wasn't true and the media blew up about it for a few weeks. He'd seen that happen before.

Other people had soulmates. His mother didn't have a soulmate. Or, if she did, she never talked about it.

Derek's mother didn't talk about soulmates like the end-all, be-all of life. Not like other people talked about them, all starry-eyed and hopeful. She spoke about it matter-of-factly, like one would talk about what to pick up at the store or what the weather was like outside. She never dwelled on it for very long.

Lots of people had soulmates. Not everyone. But a lot of people. Probably, Derek had one too. The thought had never really occurred to him until just now, sitting in the uncomfortable ER chairs and wishing he could get a cast already.

Katherine and Katherine said they could feel each other sometimes, whatever that meant. If Derek had a soulmate, he wondered if they could feel him too. He wondered if they could feel the throbbing of his broken arm just as viscerally as he did, or if the pain was dull beneath their skin, an faint echo of his own injury. Like a bruise that hadn't faded yet, caused by someone they'd never met.

It seemed pretty unfortunate, he thought, to have somebody you're meant to spend your whole life with and all you could feel was their pain.

 

 

_Now_

"You _guys_ ," Chowder said as sternly as he could manage, crossing his arms.

Dex glanced up from his computer but didn't stop typing. He reached for his coffee mug. Nursey at least had the courtesy to set his book in his lap and look back at Chowder.

Though Nursey and Dex both shared Shitty's old room, it wasn't that common to find them just sitting on the couch together in silence. Though, Chowder had to admit, it was more common than it had been their freshman year. He figured rooming together had helped them get along after all.

Still, that meant they had been growing on each other, and the last thing the team needed was for them to regress back to hair pulling and taunts. Especially since Chowder would be the one caught in the middle if they did.

As if Bitty's word wasn't proof enough, it wasn't hard to notice the small, circular bruise that had found a home along the underside of Dex's jaw. Chowder frowned.

"You were fighting!" He said firmly.

Dex choked on his drink. Nursey not-so-subtly eyed the way the coffee sloshed around in Dex's mug and angled his book away from the possible spill radius. He clapped Dex on the back, most likely just to be an asshole since Dex had already caught his breath by that point. Dex shot him a weak glare.

"Are you okay?" Chowder asked, arms dropping to his sides, sternness forgotten. He hadn't been trying to catch Dex off-guard. He hadn't thought his accusation would be so surprising.

"I'm fine," Dex said, waving him off. He eyed Chowder and asked carefully, "You think we've been fighting?"

"I thought we were doing pretty well so far," Nursey added. There was something weird about his voice, something teasing, but Chowder ignored it in favor of the evidence at hand.

"You guys were totally fighting," he said.

"We argue all the time," Dex said. He looked ready to go back to his computer.

"No," Chowder corrected. "Like a fistfight or something."

"A fistfight," Nursey repeated. He had balanced his book on the arm of the couch and sported that same look on his face he always did when he was getting ready to tease Chowder about something. Chowder ignored it.

"Do I look like I've been in a fistfight?" Dex asked plainly.

Chowder pointed to where the bruise would be on his own jaw. Startled, Dex slapped his palm over his face to cover it up, like he had forgotten it was there. He shot Nursey a dirty look. Nursey smirked.

"Maybe not like a really bad one," Chowder allowed. "But you guys obviously had some kind of fight!"

He wasn't going to let them off the hook with this one. If there was a problem, they needed to get to the bottom of it. Nursey and Dex lived together, after all. A problem like that would only escalate.

"Bitty said you guys were roughhousing and stuff," he continued. "But if you guys are going to fight, at least do it on the ice when you're wearing pads so you don't get hurt! Or don't fight at all because it's actually pretty distracting. Sorry. But we can still talk through your fights like adults!"

He was sure that was what Bitty would want. It was _definitely_ what Chowder wanted.

"What else did Bitty say?" Nursey asked casually.

"That Dex hurt is arm, but Dex said he jut slept on it funny," Chowder said. "But you guys should know better! That could really effect when you guys get to play. What if you hurt something?"

Nursey snorted. Dex didn't look at him.

"I'm not having this conversation," he said flatly.

"But you _guys_!" Maybe he was pressing a little too much, but Chowder refused to accept defeat this time. They had been doing so, so much better than last year. "Come on, it's way better when you guys aren't out to get each other, right? Isn't it best when we all get along?"

Nursey and Dex shot each other an unreadable look, and Chowder wasn't oblivious enough to let _that_ go unnoticed. Nursey raised his eyebrows, and Dex rolled his eyes and looked away. Chowder waited.

"Fine," Dex said. He waved his hand in Nursey's direction. "You do it."

Chowder couldn't help but rock on the balls of his feet. Whatever they were talking about, he didn't think it could be that good. Not of Dex was so hesitant about it. He couldn't imagine what would be worse than getting into fights when they thought nobody was looking, however. He didn't want to imagine the first month of their sophomore year was a total lie.

Nursey caught Chowder's eye.

"Dex and I are boning," he announced.

Dex immediately smacked him roughly in the shoulder. Nursey leaned away from the blow and then righted himself easily.

"What the hell?" Dex hissed.

Nursey, unfazed, still sported a relaxed smirk. "You told me to go."

"I didn't know you'd say it like _that_ ," Dex snapped.

Nursey shrugged, shifting his gaze back to Chowder. Chowder, somehow still managing to stand upright after the revelation his two best friends were apparently having sex behind everyone's back, tried to school his face into something less expressive. He didn't think it worked.

"You guys are..."

Chowder trailed off, and before he could help himself, he was staring at the bruise on Dex's jaw again. Except now that he _really_ looked, he couldn't help but notice that it looked less a mark born from a fist and more like something made by a mouth. Apparently Nursey's mouth.

Which Chowder was totally not going to think about, because it wasn't cool to think about your two really good friends kissing and giving each other hickeys and doing _stuff_ right there in front of them. Or in general. Probably.

Somehow, Chowder tore his eyes away from the bruise on Dex's jaw but not before he caught a glance of where Dex's skin met the collar of his shirt. He couldn't help but wonder if there were even more hickeys hidden underneath. Which was a super un-cool thought to have about your friends when they didn't even know about it. It made Chowder feel dirty.

So then Chowder looked at Nursey to try to clear his mind, except then all he could think about was Dex giving _Nursey_ a hickey instead, and how even though the bruise would be harder to see against Nursey's darker skin, the image alone of—

Chowder felt his face go red all at once, and it must have been obvious because Nursey laughed almost as soon as Chowder felt the heat rise to his face. He sputtered. Dex ducked his head, annoyed, but probably not nearly as mad as he pretended to be.

"I'm really sorry!" Chowder managed. "I thought—I totally didn't mean to pry, I'm super sorry—"

"Chill," Nursey said, raising his hand placating gesture and looking very pleased with himself. "It's cool, man."

"But I mean— I didn't want to force you to say anything! I'm really sorry—"

"Hey," Dex said, finally looking at Chowder again. There was a little bit of an awkward set to his shoulders, but for the most part he seemed pretty calm. It was the opposite of what Chowder had expected, really. "It's fine, all right? If I didn't want you to know, I would have said something. And clearly Nursey has no problems blurting out our sex life, so."

He shot Nursey a half-hearted glare, but there was no heat behind it. Chowder felt the uncomfortable ball of anxiety unwind in his chest.

He glanced between the two of them rapidly, trying to sense the change between them. Was it the way they looked at each other? The relaxed way they had thrown their things together on the couch? Chowder couldn't put his finger on it. But something was definitely different. He wondered how he hadn't noticed it before.

"Sorry," he said again. "I lectured you guys about fighting and everything. I guess I should have trusted you more. Sorry."

"It's really okay," Dex said again. He even gave Chowder a reassuring smile, even though it came off kind of stiff. It was the thought that counted. Then he glanced at his computer and sprang up from the couch. "Shit, I'm late for class."

There was a whirlwind of movement, and before Chowder knew it, Dex had stuffed his computer into his backpack and stood in the doorframe leading out to the porch.

"Goodbye, honey!" Nursey called sarcastically from the couch. He hadn't budged from his seat.

"Knock it off," Dex grumbled from the doorway. He didn't sound terribly upset, however. He paused just long enough to nod farewell to Chowder and then practically sprinted out the door.

Chowder glanced at the time on his own phone. He was pretty sure Dex had chemistry in about five minutes. Whoops.

"Uh, sorry I thought you guys were beating each other up instead of dating," he said again, shifting from foot to foot. "That was pretty bad of me to assume."

Nursey shrugged. "It's cool, man. Honestly, I wouldn't have expected it either. Me and Poindexter? Definitely not the first pair that comes to mind when I think 'compatible.'"

Chowder wouldn't have thought so either, but the rare moments on the ice where Dex and Nursey suddenly seemed to _click_ tugged at the back of his mind. Once they learned to take that kind of synchronization into everyday life, he guessed this sort of thing was inevitable.

Nursey patted the now empty space next to him, and Chowder took it, grateful he didn't have to stand in the middle of the room anymore.

"And to be honest," Nursey added. "We're not really dating."

Chowder frowned. "You're not?"

"There's a difference between—" Nursey waved his hand vaguely. Chowder was grateful he didn't have to suddenly slide back into that imagery again. "You know. And actually dating."

"Oh." Chowder thought to himself for a moment, toeing the uneven floorboards with the edge of his shoe. He looked over at Nursey, whose face seemed carefully blank. "Do you _want_ to date?"

Nursey shrugged, casual. Everything Nursey did was casual when he wasn't accidentally hitting kids with his hockey bag. Chowder wondered if he kept up the front on purpose.

"We're working on it," Nursey said vaguely. "Anyway, I wouldn't go around telling anyone just yet."

"I won't!" Chowder promised. Normally that would have been kind of hard because Bitty always seemed to have a sixth sense for when he wasn't telling the truth, but he felt pretty invested in keeping his mind off of what Nursey and Dex did behind closed doors. He would be having a lot of embarrassing moments soon otherwise.

Nursey smiled at him, a slow, crooked twist of his mouth, and Chowder's skin tingled.

"Cool," Nursey said. "Hey, don't you have class at the same time as Dex?"

Chowder glanced at the clock.

"Oh, no!"

He gasped and jerked to his feet, stumbling over Nursey's backpack as he did. Nursey laughed.

 

 

 

_Then_

Will scowled, shoving his face deeper into his pillow.

At sixteen, he didn't have a lot of time to himself. Between school, work, and practice, he had very few days to spend at home relaxing. He should have been catching a few extra hours of sleep or cramming in a little bit of extra summer reading before the fall.

It had been pure happenstance that his uncle said he could take today off work. It wasn't going to affect his pay at all, so Will certainly wasn't going to complain. And yet somehow, instead of relaxing, something anxious buzzed in the back of his head.

He'd run through the list in his head several times already. He didn't owe anybody money, he had plenty of time to finish _Moby Dick,_ his mother hadn't asked him to do any chores today. He didn't have any explanation for the awful nervousness that crawled along his spine and gathered along the nape of his neck, nor the way his heart jolted in his chest.

Will sighed gruffly. He almost groaned in frustration, but the catch in his voice stopped that halfway through. He was so, so grateful nobody was around to hear the crack in his voice. For _some_ reason, his voice had been cracking and changing recently like he was fourteen again, and wasn't that just the icing on the cake? He'd nearly been buried in the never ending amount of shit his brothers—all long done with their own puberty—had given him about it.

The buzzing feeling in his brain didn't show any sign of stopping, so Will rolled out of bed. The house was miraculously empty when he stomped downstairs, a rarity even on a weekday. He flopped onto the couch.

Somehow, there was a hockey game already playing when he switched on the television. It looked like an older game and the image certainly wasn't anywhere close to good, but Will let himself get lost in it anyway. The buzzing in his head dulled and the nervousness crawling across his next blessedly faded the longer he spent engrossing himself in the game.

When the TV cut out a quarter of the way through, he tossed one of the small throw pillows his mother had laid out on the couch at the screen. The show came back on instantly. He made a mental note to check out the wiring soon.

For some reason, he couldn't help but run his tongue over his teeth.

 

 

 

_Now_

"So, are you guys, like, _together_ -together?"

The answer was probably 'No." Nursey had basically said as much. But even though it was really none of his business, he wanted to hear Dex's side as well. They had been getting along so much better this year, and Chowder was ecstatic at the idea his two best friends would actually date. The fact that the thought made something in Chowder's chest flutter was irrelevant.

The library table was all that separated them, but they were close enough for Dex's ankle to knock into his under the table.

Dex wrinkled his nose. "No."

"Do you want to be?"

"Why would I want to date Nursey?" Dex asked, but there wasn't nearly enough bite behind it to be mean. Chowder took that as a good sign.

"You guys are already. You know." He couldn't bring himself to actually say _having sex_ or else he would have started thinking about it too hard. He really, really had no business imagining that kind of thing. "You guys could easily date."

"Well, we're not."

"How come?"

"Because."

"Because why?"

He felt like a little kid even as the words left his mouth. Chowder frowned at himself.

Dex opened his mouth, and Chowder was sure he was going to say something like, _I'm not having this conversation._ But then he paused for a moment, thinking, and said, "Because of reasons."

If it was just that Dex found Nursey too obnoxious to date, Chowder was sure Dex would have said something. Nursey's _We're working on it_ rang in his ears.

"What kind of reasons?" He asked.

Dex looked at him carefully, lips pressed together. Like he was waiting for something. When Chowder merely looked back, he frowned. Chowder wondered if he had done something wrong.

"Reasons," Dex said again, vague. He nudged Chowder's foot with his own. "Finish your chapter."

Chowder let it drop.

 

 

 

_Then_

Samwell seemed pretty chill compared to Andover. Not that Andover had been terrible. There had been people like Shitty, after all. But they had been few and far between, and Samwell felt definitely more relaxed than private school. Derek already felt way more comfortable here than he ever had wearing the blue and brown Andover uniform.

Something had been nagging at him ever since he had parked his car, however, and the feeling only grew as he signed the sheet that said, yes, he was here for a tour. Almost on autopilot, he found himself joining the tour group that had already gathered outside the rink.

He immediately caught sight of an overexcited guy in a Sharks jersey talking animatedly to a redhead who looked painfully out of his element. Derek's heart jerked, and he found himself staring at them for a moment too long, marveling at how the tips of his fingers suddenly ached for... something. When the excited guy caught his eye, Derek pulled out his phone and pretended he hadn't just been watching them like some kind of stalker. The Sharks fan kept talking.

As the minutes ticked by, he somehow found himself standing inside the rink and standing next to the redhead. He found himself smiling at the Sharks fan's overheard chatter, impossible to miss compared to the stiff silence of the other guy. Derek almost wanted to rib him for being so awkward.

The word "chill" was on the tip of his tongue when the tour guide showed up, apparently the team manager whose name Derek barely caught. The tour had started, and Derek trailed along with the rest of them.

When the excited guy announced he had actually enrolled while still on the tour, Derek found himself smiling.

 

 

_Now_

The thing was, the knowledge that Nursey and Dex were apparently having sex didn't really change much. And what it did change seemed for the better. In fact, now that he knew what to look for, Chowder thought they got along even better on the ice than before. He couldn't recall the last time he had to block a stray puck because the two D-men were too busy arguing to keep it together. He couldn't remember the last time he had seen them argue for real, period.

For one brief, ridiculous moment, Chowder had been struck with the nervous thought that he'd suddenly be the third wheel in their friendship. But that moment never seemed to come.

He still studied with Dex, and he still sat around the Pond with Nursey on warmer days. And when all three of them managed to be in the Haus at the same time, it was Chowder who ended up squeezed between them on the couch instead of Dex and Nursey cuddling off to one side and Chowder on the other.

So Nursey and Dex getting together was actually one of the best things that had happened to Chowder all year. They were more in synch, they looked happier, and _Chowder_ felt happier because they didn't bicker meanly with each other all the time, and he knew they weren't just waiting for him to leave to pull out the big guns.

(They sometimes may have been waiting for him to leave for other reasons. He tries to give them their privacy by not thinking about it.)

And besides the weird tug in chest that occasionally happens when he looks at them for too long, things are good. He even made a B+ on his astronomy test. Things are _really_ good.

Except.

\----------

The, uh, phantom touches don't really stop.

More often than not, Chowder found himself waking up achingly hard in his jeans, the ghost of some other person's hands grazing his ribs. Those were the better days. On unlucky ones, it hits him while he's hunched over a desk with a book open, and as great as it feels, he loses at least half an hour of studying each time because of it. It's a little bit of a problem.

It's not _every_ night, but it's often enough that Chowder finds himself losing sleep over it. And it's hard to explain that you're falling asleep in your cereal again because your soulmates really like to get it on.

He's learned not to go out too late because of it. Even on a school night.

He thinks he should feel lonelier because of it, and he does, in a way. Part of him does ache because somewhere out there are two people he's dying to meet, and he has no idea where to start. But a larger part of him is glad they've found each other in the meantime. Plus, it's hard to be lonely when he has Dex and Nursey to spend his days with. He can't remember what he'd filled his days with before them. Even hockey is double the fun now, and Chowder had already loved hockey a lot.

Still, when he starts feeling secondhand arousal late in the night, a really awful part of him can't help but wonder if this is what Nursey and Dex are doing on the other side of the thin wall.

It's pretty terrible of him, he knows. Just because he knows Dex and Nursey are having sex now does _not_ mean he should be thinking about them every time he gets a boner. It's really unfair to them, and it's especially unfair to his soulmates, who are probably depending on him to be faithful, even mentally.

To be fair, he had no idea what his soulmates were like, and he tried to comfort himself with the thought that it was okay to wonder if they'd be as a practical as Dex or as thoughtful as Nursey. Still, it was a different category altogether to be wondering about their sex life.

Chowder felt really, really bad about it.

 

 

_Then_

"Why don't you both just share it?" Chowder blurted.

The words shut up Dex and Nursey for the first time in days. They both turned to stare at him, faces etched with disbelief. Even _Bitty_ looked up from his phone long enough to send him one of those sad smiles that meant he thought Chowder was hoping for something impossible.

Lardo, who had just passed by the doorway, stopped long enough to shake her head at him forlornly. Then she continued onward, clearly believing it a lost cause.

Chowder's face felt hot from all the sudden attention. He scuffed his shoe across the floor once before he remembered that was rude, and then steeled himself. He may have blurted it out on accident, but once you start something, you had to finish it.

"I mean," he said, fumbling. "Shitty gave you the room at the same time, right? It's big enough for a bunk bed. You guys can could just share it?"

It came out more question than statement. Nursey and Dex still stared at him, incredulous. From the corner of his eye, he saw Bitty place his hand over his heart in an _oh, honey_ way. Chowder felt more than a little stupid. He looked away.

And then Nursey said the impossible.

"I mean, I _guess_ we can do that," he said. Then everyone was looking at _him_ , even Chowder. "C's right. Shitty gave us both the room. We can share, so long as Dex doesn't have a breakdown while I'm trying to sleep or something."

Dex bristled. "I don't 'freak out' as much as you think I do."

"You're freaking out right now."

"I'm not!"

"Dude, chill."

"Guys!" Chowder broke in. "Come on!"

They paused again. Dex looked at Nursey, and Nursey looked at Dex. They both shrugged at the same time. If either of them had any more comments to make about _Dex, chill_ and _shut up_ and _I should get the room because_ , neither of them said anything.

And that was that.

It only took five minutes after their agreement before Chowder was starting to regret ever speaking up.

Instead of another week of fighting and then a few days of sulking from whoever lost the room, Chowder had doomed himself to a whole _year_ of fighting. And because their rooms shared a bathroom, he would be forced to listen to it _all the time_ , even in the night. There would be no escape for anybody. Dex and Nursey would be forced into each other's space all the time, and then, if they wanted to go somewhere else to cool off, one of them would have to leave while the other got the room and Chowder doubted either of them would allow that.

Everyone would be miserable all the time, and it would be all his fault, Chowder thought.

Then he thought: Okay. Maybe fighting all the time will drain the fight out of them.

And all summer, after afternoons of hanging out with his sister or seeing Farmer and texting everybody about their lives, that was what he hoped before he fell asleep.

The first three days of living together sophomore year were tense in a way Chowder didn't like to think about. Nursey and Dex only managed to keep quiet for maybe fifteen seconds at the most when Chowder begged for them to stop. The air could have been sliced with a knife in the rare moments of silence. Bitty had retreated into using his phone more than ever, and Holster had walked around with a constipated look on his face that meant he was close to doing something drastic. Ransom and Lardo had taken to carrying water bottles that they sprayed whenever Nursey and Dex got too loud. He was pretty sure Ransom was keeping track of their arguments with some kind of Excel sheet.

And then the sun rose on day four, and it wasn't terrible.

Dex didn't "accidentally" spill coffee on a poem Nursey had printed out for class, and Nursey didn't "accidentally" misplace all of Dex's chemistry notes. Chowder studied with Dex that afternoon and shared a few bagels he picked up at the store with Nursey. Chowder didn't mention the roommate situation, and neither did they.

On day five, they fought some more, but it wasn't the awful, end of the world fighting it had been. This fight was a little more casual, a little more routine, and the horrible, heavy feeling that had been starting to settle in Chowder's chest started to lift.

Day six they didn't speak to one another, and on day seven when Nursey said, "Pass the Cocoa Puffs," at breakfast, Dex did so without peep. Chowder stared.

Bitty had shaken his head in amazement when Chowder mentioned all this to him.

"If I had known living together was all it took for them to calm down," Bitty said. "I would've found a way to do this a lot earlier."

Chowder had enthusiastically agreed.

 

 

 

_Now_

"Hey, Poindexter," Nursey said, completely ignoring his homework. Chowder had long since abandoned his, too engrossed in watching the scene before him unfold. "Dex. Are you from Tennessee?"

"Don't," Dex said, his voice laced with the exhaustion of a defeated man. It didn't hinder Nursey at all.

"Because you're the only ten _I_ see."

This had been going on for ten straight minutes. Chowder wanted to be more sympathetic, but honestly he was too impressed by Nursey's endless amount of pickup lines to feel bad. They still insisted they weren't dating but that hadn't stopped Nursey in the slightest.

"Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants."

Dex said nothing. Chowder could have sworn he saw his mouth twitch.

"Your shirt has to go, but you can stay." Nursey waited. Then he said, "I'm no organ donor, but I'd be happy to give you my heart."

"Did you memorize an infinite amount of cheesy lines just for today?" Dex asked.

"Yes," Nursey said with a straight face. Dex stared at him. Chowder took pity.

"Aw, come on," he said. "We should all be working right now."

Dex nodded. " _Thank_ you."

But he could tell Dex was at least a little amused, even if he didn't want to show it. With two against one, Nursey turned to Chowder instead.

"What time do you have to be back to Heaven?" He asked.

It took Chowder a moment to process what he meant. When he did, heat traveled to his face and he sputtered. This time the upward twitch of Dex's mouth was unmistakable, though he tried to hide it. Nursey laughed out loud, causing several annoyed stares to be sent their way. He thought he heard someone whisper, "It's the hockey team _again_."

 Chowder was pretty sure he'd start thinking too-friendly thoughts again if Nursey turned his pickup line supply on _him_ , so he diverted with, "Didn't Bitty say he'd have a pie ready in an hour if we finished by then?"

It worked. Nursey flipped his book back open faster than the eye could see, and Dex secretly shot him a thumbs up from across the table. Chowder nodded when he saw it even though he'd done it more for him than Dex. He extracted his feet from the tangled web that he, Nursey and Dex had created under the table. Just to be safe.

 

 

 

_Then_

"Get out of my space," Dex growled, adamantly looking at the papers in front of him. He couldn't focus on his own writing anymore.

"It's my room too," Nursey drawled. "We're supposed to share, remember?"

He was teasing, trying to rile Dex up, but there was an edge to Nursey's voice as well. Dex had no doubt Nursey's blood was boiling just as much as his. The only difference was he was pretending to restrain himself. Dex was dangerously close to doing. Something.

"And yet you're choosing to practically sit on top of me," Dex said, gripping his pencil tightly.

Dex hadn't moved from his seat by his desk for over an hour, but Nursey had rolled his chair closer and closer, inch by inch, until he had planted himself firmly between the small gap between Dex's chair and the lower bunk. There was almost no space between them, especially not with the way Nursey practically dared Dex to do something about it.

"What's wrong?" Nursey breathed. He leaned in so close Dex could almost feel the heat radiating off of him. "Don't you like it when I'm on top of you?"

There was some kind of innuendo in there that Dex was going to ignore for multiple reasons. It was much harder to ignore the way the space almost cackled between them, the leap of his heart when Nursey smirked obnoxiously, almost no space between their faces. And it was _ridiculously_ hard to ignore the way he tapped his fingers on Dex's desk just to annoy him, dangerously close to brushing Dex's skin. 

Something akin to electricity buzzed in Dex's veins when he said, "You want to go?"

He hadn't exactly meant it as a fight, but he also hadn't meant it as. Well. He didn't know what he meant. And suddenly his brain was too foggy with the unnamable to care.

One of them surged forward first, breaking the tension that had been building up since even before they started sharing a room. His mouth his Nursey's like a bullet hit a body, vicious, unforgiving. Their teeth clicked. Nursey's hot breath mingled with his. It felt more like a fight than a kiss.

Dex's neck was stiff from hunching over his desk for so long, and he was painfully aware of it as Nursey dragged his fingers across the skin there and gripped him tightly. His heart hammered away in his chest like it was going to explode at any moment. His dick definitely jumped.

He sucked in a quick breath when Nursey's teeth knocked into his again, and Dex responded by biting his lower lip a little too hard to be friendly. The fighters on the back of his neck tightened.

" _Shit_ ," Nursey muttered when their mouths parted just long enough to gasp for air. The sound of his voice in the otherwise empty room brought Dex back into himself.

His eyes snapped open despite the fact he couldn't recall when he had closed them, and he jerked back into his own chair. The back end of his chair hit the desk as he started to scoot away, but Nursey hooked his foot behind one of the wheels to keep him from getting very far. They froze.

Nursey looked at him, an eyebrow quirked in question. His mouth was swollen. Dex refused to touch his own lips, fearing they fared the same.

Someone downstairs dropped a pot in the kitchen, reminding him that they weren't alone. Dex was painfully aware of how Chowder sat just a room away, separated only by two flimsy walls and a door that only locked half the time.

Nursey was waiting, obviously, for Dex to speak up first. He had no idea what to say. There was something pleasant, a feeling of certainty, dancing around the pit of his stomach. He had no idea what that meant.

"What the fuck?" He eventually rasped.

Nursey raised his other eyebrow. "So do you want to ignore what just happened or keep going?"

"Ignore it," Dex said instantly, because that was what it felt like he was supposed to do despite every inch of himself screaming the opposite.

"Really?" Nursey asked. "Because that tent in your pants says otherwise."

Dex didn't have to look down to see if Nursey was telling the truth. As mortifying as it was, he could feel the evidence for himself.

"So does yours," Dex shot back instantly, because it was true. He nearly regretted it when Nursey merely looked back at him without reaction.

"Yeah," he said simply. And then waited.

Dex took a deep breath. The Haus had gone silent again, and a heat that had long since gathered in the pit of his stomach spread throughout the rest of him.

It felt like he had been hooked and now Nursey was reeling him in. He could almost feel the actual metal piercing his skin, dragging him closer and closer. He wondered if this was how fish felt in the net. It was difficult to fight against the current. He'd been doing it for over a year. He didn't want to anymore.

"Fuck," Dex whispered to himself. He leaned forward. Nursey met him halfway, grinning like a man who had just won a very long bet. Dex tried to wipe the smile off his face with his own mouth.

It felt like Nursey had set forth some kind of challenge, and Dex, unwilling to back down, pressed the palm of his hand against Nursey's knee and slid it upwards. He felt triumphant when it was Nursey's turn to suck in a sharp breath, clearly unprepared. He was sure Nursey could feel his own smirk as their mouths moved against one another, only slightly less violent than their first kiss.

They were both sitting on the edge of their rolling chairs, their legs tangled together. Nursey's chair had basically locked itself into place between Dex and the bed, but Dex's chair kept wanting to roll backwards. After the third time Dex had to plant his feet on the floor in frustration, Nursey tugged at his sleeve. He jerked his head towards the bed.

They collapsed in a tangle of limbs on the mattress, both of them just barely able to avoid smacking their heads on the top bunk as they went down. Somehow Dex's belt had come undone, as well as his zipper, and even without a mirror, he just _knew_ he'd made the most embarrassing face on earth when Nursey pushed his hand past his underwear. He retaliated by cupping Nursey through his pants.

The sound Nursey made went straight to his groin, and the rest was a hurried blur.

Dex's skin was still tingling, despite the fact Nursey had already collapsed on his side between Dex and the wall. It felt like he was coming down off some kind of high, even though he'd never actually smoked a joint in his life. He wondered what the hell was wrong with him.

"So," Nursey said, his chest still rising and falling a little faster than normal. "Has it ever been like that with anyone else?"

So Nursey had noticed it too. Part of him didn't want to fuel any more of Nursey's ego, but he didn't have it in him to tell such a blatant lie. Not right after whatever they'd just done, at least.

"No. You?"

" _Hell_ no," Nursey said. Dex was surprised at the emphasis. He turned his head to look at Nursey, only to find Nursey was looking back. They were close enough that Dex could feel the warm breath on his cheek.

Something passed between them. Some kind of spark or shift or _something_. The pieces slotted into place, and all a part of Dex's brain could say was _Oh_. The tingling in his skin turned to heat.

Dex blinked. Nursey stared back at him, for once also wide eyed.

"Oh," Nursey said, echoing the voice in Dex's head. For his part, Dex made some kind of noise with the back of his throat. The hook in his chest, the line connecting him to Nursey, felt nearly solid. There was little denying it now.

 _Soulmate_ wasn't a word tossed around easily in his household, but there was little explanation otherwise for the sudden flare of energy between them or how, if he had been lying down with almost any other guy, Dex would not have been nearly as relaxed. Not that he'd tell Nursey that.

It certainly explained why he always felt compelled to hang around Nursey, anyway, no matter how frustrating he was. The only other person he'd ever felt that drawn to had been Chowder, and Dex had just chalked that up to having a pretty good friend for the first time in a while. It certainly wasn't a train of thought that he was going to go down now of all times.

It wasn't that he'd been denying the idea of a soulmate, exactly. There had just always been a disconnect between the idea and his sense of self. But now that he'd finally made the connection, a few other odd thing he'd brushed off had fallen into place.

He figured it probably wouldn't be that hard to channel their need to argue into something more productive.

 

On his part, Nursey looked like someone had knocked the wind out of him. There was no doubt he was feeling the same tingling electric sensation Dex felt.

"Well," Nursey said. "We always did have some kind of tension."

 

 

 

_Now_

Sometimes Chowder wondered if he was projecting.

"Projecting" was a funny word. He'd only heard it used in reference to movie clips, and when Ransom and Holster got too stressed about TV characters and their very specific problems that sometimes sounded like Holster's problems. Usually just Holster's problems. But sometimes Ransom hit a very specific time when going through stress stages and it came up then as well.

Chowder wondered if he was doing that now.

Lately it seemed like someone was always touching him. More specifically, that Nursey and Dex were always touching him. It was possible he was imagining it. Probable. And yet.

When he stretched to one of the higher shelves, Nursey's hand was on his back. When sat down on the couch, Dex was taking up the other half of the space. When he walked to class, someone walked with him, and someone else walked him back. Chowder liked hugs and hanging out, so that in itself wasn't a big deal. But he was starting to think all this touching might be a bad thing.

It wasn't that he didn't like Nursey and Dex, because he did. That was the problem.

He'd tried not to think about them in anything more than totally platonic situations, and for the most part it worked. He didn't have to drown in guilt from betraying his friends and his soulmates, who trusted him. But then, even though Dex and Nursey never really let on to what they did behind closed doors, Chowder couldn't help but let his mind drift whenever Dex leaned in too close to Nursey's space or Nursey riled Dex up until they were both flushed from arguing. That usually made Chowder pretty flushed as well.

Even now, he couldn't tell if Nursey and Dex were walking closer to him than normal or if he just noticed it more now, for whatever reason.

 _Better safe than sorry_ , he thought, shoulders heavy with guilt as he pretended to naturally fall behind by a few steps. This trick worked for maybe about a second before Dex and Nursey noticed and adjusted their speeding accordingly. All without missing a step.

It happened every time he tried to separate himself from them. They always noticed. Part of him felt secretly happy he had such good friends. The other part just felt bad he wasn't trying harder. Maybe if he tried harder, he'd stop thinking about what it would be like if Nursey and Dex actually went on a few dates or if he went along with them.

 

 

_Then_

At age twelve, Nursey had only been halfway right. Soulmates just about sharing pain. It was the way the air practically vibrated when your eyes locked. It was the way the puzzle pieces came together when your skin brushed theirs. It was when how you realized who you were looking at, all the breath left your lungs and you were stuck with the singular thought of, _Oh, it's you._

It was also being able to crawl into someone's lap and have that extra tingle of pleasure that run down your spine because you knew you were making them feel just as good as you did.

He knew he was a little more prone to accidents than some people, so maybe it would have been a better idea to wait until Dex was out of the rolling chair to sit in his lap. But college was all about dumb ideas, so even though the chair creaked ominously when Nursey's thighs settled on Dex's, he didn't stand up immediately.

They kissed slower than usual, a little more tenderly, and even when Dex pulled away it took a few more seconds than normal before he opened his eyes.

"If you break my chair, you're paying for it," he said softly. Nursey nearly snickered. Dex had grown soft as of late.

"You could probably fix it anyway," Nursey said. He had seen Dex fix plenty of otherwise broken things. Except Betsy. But he had certainly enjoyed the sight of Dex hard at work, covered in grease, anyway.

"Not if you crush it into the floorboards," Dex said. "Like you're apparently trying to do." And yet he hadn't made any real move to push Nursey onto the floor yet. He obviously wasn't that concerned. Still.

"If you're so worried, how about you join me on the bed instead?"

Nursey wiggled his eyebrows. Dex snorted.

"You're ridiculous," he said, exasperated, but he stood up anyway.

 

 

 

 

_Now_

"You said chocolate, right?" Dex asked, handing over the double-scooped cone. In his other hand was a mint milkshake. He handed Chowder back his change.

"Yeah," Chowder said. "Thank you!"

Dex had gone over to one of the food trucks while Chowder snagged a table. They both donned light jackets, but it was never too cold for ice cream. There was a free seat across the table, but Dex slid into the one next to him instead.

Dex chewed on the end of his straw. It was a habit of his.

"When's your next test in marine life?" He asked.

Chowder thought about it, licking the edge of his cone so the ice cream didn't melt across his fingers. "Probably like two weeks from now, I think."

"Do you want me to help you study again?"

He probably needed the extra help, but.

"Don't you have your own tests?" Chowder asked. "You guys really helped me out a lot already."

Dex shrugged, taking a sip of his milkshake. "It's just flashcards."

He shifted in his seat, and his knee rubbed against Chowder's. There was plenty of space on either side of them to scoot away. Neither did.

"Thanks!" Chowder said. Despite the cool breeze, the tip of his ice cream was melting faster than he could eat it. He bit a large chunk out of the top. That would at least slow it down.

"Thanks a bunch," he said again around a mouthful of ice cream. A bit of the cone had brushed his chin when he'd taken a bite, so he rubbed the excess ice cream away with the back of his wrist.

"Doesn't that hurt?" Dex asked, grimacing. He eyed Chowder's cone.

Chowder looked at him. "Does what hurt?"

"Biting your ice cream," Dex clarified. "Don't your teeth hurt?"

Chowder took another bite out of the top. Dex watched with growing horror.

"Teeth don't feel anything," Chowder told him. Dex shook his head and looked away.

"If you say so," he muttered. He raised his straw to his lips. Their knees bumped again.

Chowder was down to only half a cone and whatever ice cream had managed to escape toward the bottom by the time Dex had finished only a quarter of his milkshake. He caught Dex eyeing his cone anyway.

"You want another one?" Dex asked, raising an eyebrow. The end of his straw, covered in teeth marks, had almost completely flattened.

Chowder shook his head. "That's okay."

"We can start heading back to the Haus then."

Chowder frowned.

"I thought you had to go to the library?" He asked. Dex shrugged.

"I need to grab my computer," he said.

Chowder glanced at where Dex's backpack leaned against the wooden bench. He thought Dex had brought his computer with him. But maybe he was wrong.

"Don't you want to finish your milkshake?"

"I can finish it on the way."

What had been a bright afternoon was slowly growing overcast, so Chowder finished the last of his cone and followed Dex's lead. They stood up at the same time, their arms pressing together as they did. Dex chewed on his straw for most of the way back.

It was about a fifteen minute walk to the Haus from the food trucks, and Chowder couldn't count the number of times he and Dex bumped into each other as they walked. He figured it was because they were talking too much and not paying enough attention, but no matter how he stepped over, his elbow always seemed to graze Dex's once more.

 

 

 

_Then_

Nursey hadn't seen it coming.

Actually, that wasn't completely true. Part of him had probably seen it coming. He had already acknowledged to himself that he felt at ease whenever he was in the same room as Dex, even when they were arguing, and how that feeling always seemed to double whenever Chowder showed up. And as much as he loved getting dirty under the sheets with the lights off in their shared bedroom, he equally enjoyed throwing his arm over Chowder's shoulders while they watched some shitty movie on TV or reading for class while Chowder chatted away with Dex close by.

So, yes, part of him had seen it coming.

He just hadn't seen it coming like _this_.

Sitting in the kitchen doing homework? Check.

Dex sitting to his left, also doing homework? Check.

The front door flying open and Chowder making a beeline for the kitchen? Check.

"Is anybody here?" Chowder called out. There was a distinctive thump of him dropping his backpack by the door, but by the time he finished his sentence, he had already entered the kitchen. "Hey!"

"Hey yourself," Nursey greeted, thumbing the page in his book and setting it to the side.

Dex nodded at him. He jerked his thumb toward the counter. "Bitty left some mini-pies out if you want some."

"Thanks!" Chowder said with a grin like sunshine. Nursey watched him practically vibrate over to the counter, but instead of stuffing one of the pies into his mouth immediately, he wrapped two of them in a napkin and shoved them in the pouch of his hoodie. "I have to run out again in a minute, but guess what?"

"What?" Nursey said, humoring him. Dex's voice echoed him only a beat behind. They glanced at each other, then back to Chowder.

"I totally aced my marine biology exam!" Chowder announced.

Nursey smiled. It was no secret how nervous Chowder had been about the exam. He and Dex had spent several afternoons with flashcards quizzing him over and over until he got everything right. He still felt like he could name how many different species of coral reefs there were without looking it up, and he hadn't even been the one taking the test. 

"That's really great," Dex said, and Nursey could tell without looking that he was smiling.

"I know! I made a ninety-three!" Nursey doubted Chowder's grin could get any wider. "And you guys are the reason that happened! Thank you so much for helping me!"

Something startled to crackle under Nursey's skin, and by the time Chowder bounded over to their seats, it had become a full storm.

Since Dex and Nursey were both facing the table, Chowder threw an arm over both their shoulders and pulled them close. Goosebumps formed along the nape of Nursey's neck. Chowder didn't seem to notice.

"Thank you!" He said again, squeezing their shoulders. "I really do have to run back to class, but I wanted you guys to know that you really helped me out. You're the best friends ever!"

Nursey glanced over and found Dex, wide-eyed and startled, staring back. He was feeling exactly the same thing Nursey was.

"No problem," Nursey managed after a moment.

Chowder pulled back, patting his pocket to make sure the pies were still in place, and then headed for the door. He paused halfway through, and Nursey waited for the revelation to hit him as well.

Chowder visibly shook once, a shiver that seemed to run through his whole body. He flexed his fingers as if testing them for the first time.  A beat passed. Nursey waited.

And then Chowder seemed to just _brush it off_ , like he was completely used to the lightning strike of energy that now coursed through Nursey's veins like a drug. He continued into the hallway.

They both listened silently as Chowder made his way across the creaking floorboards of the Haus. The front door slammed shut before either of them piped up.

"What the fuck?" Dex said at last, more bewildered than angry.

Nursey blinked. The electricity already seemed to be dying down into a pleasant tingle on his skin. Dex was still staring at the spot in the doorway where Chowder used to be.

So he had suspected, a little.

He just hadn't expected it to be like _that_.

 

 

 

_Now_

"Do you want to visit New York over the summer sometime?" Nursey asked suddenly.

"Sure," Chowder said, just as Nursey tripped in the middle of the sidewalk and fell flat on his face. "Oh! Are you okay?"

A couple passing by spared them a glance but didn't stop. Chowder helped Nursey back to his feet. There was a fresh tear in the knee of his jeans, but he didn't seem injured. Even his face looked relatively unscathed. Though that may have just been the beard covering it up

"Yeah, I'm totally cool," Nursey lied, trying and failing for casual.  He brushed idly brushed himself off like the dirt on his jeans was an afterthought. "I meant to do that."

"You meant to trip?"

"Yes."

Chowder sent him a skeptical look. "Why?"

"Aesthetic," Nursey said instantly, without looking at him.

"Falling down doesn't seem very disciplined," Chowder told him.

Nursey frowned. They were still standing in the middle of the sidewalk. "What?"

"I thought aesthetic was about not indulging in stuff," Chowder said.

It took a moment for Nursey to find the connection.

"That's ascetic," he corrected. " _Ae_ sthetic is about how you look."

Chowder blinked. "So you _are_ a hipster."

"Wrong," Nursey corrected. "I just like a lot of things before anybody else."

Chowder smiled. The ascetic/aesthetic thing had been a mix-up, but he had teased about the hipster thing on purpose. He decided to give Nursey an easy break.

"So you want me to visit over the summer?"

He started walking again. Nursey paused like he was collecting his thoughts, but he was probably trying to make sure he wouldn't trip again.

"Sure," Nursey said. "You want to?"

"Yeah!" Chowder agreed. "That'd be 'swawesome! I'd just need to figure out when so I can book a ticket.''

"Don't bother," Nursey told him. "I can drive down."

That caught Chowder by surprise. "Really?"

Nursey shrugged like it was no big deal. "Yeah, sure. Maybe I'll even grab Poindexter. Make it a big trip, like Ransom and Holster do."

"Don't Holster and Ransom live like two hours away from each other?" Chowder pointed out. "California is a lot farther."

"It's no big deal," Nursey said like a person who genuinely thought it was no big deal and wasn't just falsely assuring him.

"Okay," Chowder said, because as long as Nursey was sure. "Then, yeah, I'll totally visit. And the year after that, you can come visit me!"

"Cool," Nursey said, looking straight ahead. He stumbled over a pebble but caught himself before he fell. Chowder found himself walking closer and closer to make sure he didn't trip the rest of the way back to the Haus. Nursey eventually threw an arm over his shoulder. He probably needed the extra balance.

 

_Then_

The February temperatures in Massachusetts were too close to single digits for Will's tastes. He sniffed miserably, disgusted both with himself and the gray, overcast skies. He wondered if it would snow again later or if the dangerous layers of ice on the road would simply build up overnight. The wind stung his eyes. He sniffed again.

At fourteen, nobody was willing to hire him just yet, but Will refused to hang around the house doing nothing, even on a day as miserable as today. His mother was counting the candles in case the power went out, his father was fixing the pipe under the sink, his brothers were all running odd jobs for his uncles, and Will refused to sit on the couch doing nothing. Even if that meant shoveling the snow out of the driveway.

It was his least favorite chore, and he much rather would have been checking the roof for leaks or making sure none of the pipes burst in the cold. But first come, first serve in the Poindexter household, and since Will was the youngest of four, that made him last.

He threw another scoop of the endless pile of snow over his shoulder before flexing his fingers. They felt stiff beneath his brother's hand-me-down glove. The driveway was only halfway cleared.

The front door swung open, and Uncle Freddy stepped out onto the porch steps to survey the progress. His close cut brown hair was peppered with gray. Will nodded to him in acknowledgement. Uncle Freddy stepped off the porch.

Once he had trudged through enough of the "white bullshit" (as he called it) to clear the lawn, he clapped Will on the shoulder, though Will could barely feel it through his thick jacket.

"You doing okay out here?" Uncle Freddy asked. When Will nodded, he looked at the half of the driveway still waiting to be done. "How much longer do you think this is gonna take? Another hour?"

"Probably," Will guessed. He leaned against his shovel, secretly dreading the rest of his work. It would most likely snow again tonight and ruin everything anyway.

Uncle Freddy grunted. "I'll probably stick around for another hour before heading home myself. Your Aunt Martha always nags when I get back late." As if to emphasize this, he grimaced. "In the meantime, call me if you need anything."

Will nodded, even though Uncle Freddy was doing his work just like everybody else and Will wasn't going to drag anyone else out to help him when he could shovel the driveway perfectly well by himself. As much as he secretly agreed that it was "white bullshit."

"Got it," he said.

Uncle Freddy nodded approvingly. He clapped Will on the shoulder again.

"Good man," he said. "Keep on shoveling this white bullshit and all that muscle you'll build will sweep your soulmate off her feet in no time."

"Yeah," Will said vaguely, even though he wasn't sure what he was supposed to think. He tugged his scarf up over his nose so his uncle wouldn't see the twist to his mouth.

It wasn't often anybody in his family threw around the word "soulmate," and it was even more rarely that it was directed at _him_. He supposed they were real. It was just hard to wrap his brain around.

"Keep up the good work," his uncle said before trudging back up to the house. Uncle Freddy had enough sense not to stay out in the cold longer than he had to.

A particularly icy gust of wind nearly blew Will's cap off his head and he wiped the tears that gathered in his eyes with a gloved hand. If he hated shoveling snow the most, the wind that blurred his vision was a close second.

Another half of the driveway to go. Will flex his hands again and got to work.

 

 

 

 

_Now_

Ransom had a test on Monday, Chowder was pretty sure. Which meant Holster was probably in the attic trying to keep him somewhere in the realm of sanity. Bitty had marked on the new whiteboard pinned to his door that he was Not To Be Disturbed, which meant he was probably talking into his computer camera again. Lardo was either doing something outrageously cool or tearing her hair out over her latest project. She had enlisted Chowder's help to carry about four buckets of bright orange paint up to the apartment she shared with one her art friends, so it was probably the latter. He didn't envy her position.

Which left Chowder, Nursey, and Dex stuck in the Haus living room on a Friday night. Instead of taking up his usual middle spot on the couch, Chowder slumped over the arm. His hip was pressed snugly against Dex's side. Nursey sat on the other end of the couch.

Earlier in the day, Farmer had asked if he wanted to hang out with a few of her teammates in the evening. Chowder had sadly turned her down. He'd been on the verge of sleep when she asked, but now that several hours and the process of walking all the way back to the Haus had passed, he wasn't quite on the cusp of exhaustion as he had been. He didn't have enough energy to actually think he could make it if he asked if she was still on campus though. He hoped she was having a good time.

He was briefly debating the merits of going to bed early versus forcing himself to stay up when Nursey opened his mouth.

"You guys do realize it's a Friday night and we're not doing anything, right?" Nursey said, turning his head to look at them. He pressed his bookmark between the pages of whatever novel he'd just found a stopping place for. He looked at them expectantly.

"Some of us have work to do," Dex said instantly, even though they all knew his test wasn't until next Thursday and he had been clearly browsing news websites on his laptop for the past hour. His response was automatic.

Nursey craned his neck forward to get a better look at Chowder.

"Hey, C, you okay there?"

"Yeah," Chowder responded, his words clearer than expected. He propped his head up with the palm of his hand. "It's just been a long week. Sorry."

"It's cool if you want to head up early," Nursey said.

"Yeah," Dex echoed, eyeing Chowder as well.

Chowder sat up straighter, even though fatigue tugged at his bones. The walk upstairs seemed like a long way away. He preferred to doze.

"I'm good," he protested. "I'm still up."

"If you say so," Dex said. He sounded doubtful.

"Hey," Nursey said, nudging Dex with his elbow. "Can you hook your computer up to the TV?"

Dex shot him a look. "The TV is a piece of junk that was probably made in 1990."

"Yeah, but can you do it?"

Dex looked at the TV. He considered it.

"Probably."

That settled it then. While Dex stood up to fiddle with the wires, Chowder flopped over in the new space provided. The arm of the couch would have made a decent pillow, but he scooted a few inches to the left and pressed against Nursey's side instead. His socked feet curled up on the now empty cushion.

Bitty would have been appalled to find out his face had touched the couch fabric without a barrier between them, Chowder reasoned with himself. Plus, even though Nursey's poor circulation usually meant he had cold hands, he was a lot more comfortable to lean against than the lumpy arm of the couch.

One moment the TV was full of static and the next, the Netflix logo stared back at them. Chowder would have whistled if he felt up to it. Instead he clapped twice in appreciation.

"What's your password?" Dex asked. Nursey told him, sliding an arm around Chowder's shoulders as he did.

Dex clicked on a random movie under the "Action" section. Chowder missed the title sequence and had his eyes closed for most of the opening. When Dex stood up, Chowder reluctantly started move back to the far end of the couch, but Dex gestured for him to move his feet instead.

Instead of taking his place in the middle, Dex sat on the end, sandwiching Chowder between them. Chowder barely caught what seemed to be an approving look from Nursey.

Without really thinking about it, Chowder readjusted. It was uncomfortable to keep his legs curled up so close, so he stretched them across Dex's lap instead. Dex laid a hand on Chowder's jean-covered shin. He could feel the heat from Dex's hand through the fabric.

Stuck between two human pillows, Chowder felt more comfortable than if he had actually grabbed his own pillow from upstairs. Warmer, too. Nursey didn't even seem to notice the additional weight on his side. His hand cupped Chowder's shoulder as if to keep him in place even though Chowder had no plans of moving any time soon.

"You're wiped, dude," Nursey said. Chowder grunted what might have been a yes in response.

Nursey and Dex must have been watching the movie, but they offered little commentary and Chowder couldn't bring himself to open his eyes. The movie became just a nonsensical as the rest of the Haus's creaking background noise.

At some point, Dex relaxed enough to let his forearms rest on top of Chowder's legs rather than just his hand. Chowder was only dimly aware of this, just as he was only dimly aware of when Nursey's thumb started rubbing circles on hi skin through his hoodie. He was too tired to acknowledge the movement, and he only felt warmer because of it. Not even the muffled car explosions from the TV could rouse him.

They must have all fallen asleep at some point because when Chowder woke up, the first thing he saw was Dex's neck tilted at a very uncomfortable angle against the back of the couch. When he stretched and looked upward, Chowder could see Nursey had adjusted to an equally uncomfortable position. No doubt they would both wake up aching.

There was a flash, and when Chowder's vision cleared, he caught the last of Holster turning the corner, apple in one hand and phone in the other. No doubt on his way to deliver both to Ransom. Chowder blinked the rest of the sleep from his eyes.

His back ached something awful, but he didn't bother to stand just yet. He was still too drowsy to move. Still, sunlight was already streaming in through the windows and if Nursey and Dex slept any longer, they would probably feel it for the rest of the day.

He nudged Dex with his foot first.

"Hey," Chowder croaked. He cleared his throat and tried again. His mouth tasted pretty awful. "Hey, Dex."

"What?" Dex grumbled, eyes opening instantly. His lips twisted like he had just registered the taste in his mouth.

That's what happened when you didn't brush your teeth before bed, Chowder thought. Not that he had done any differently. It was pretty disgusting.

Dex twisted his head to the side and a joint in his neck popped painfully. Chowder winced, but Dex didn't seem to nice.

He and Dex both reached over to nudge Nursey awake. Chowder, only half twisting around, poked his cheek. Dex shook his shoulder gently.

Nursey stirred but didn't awaken. Dex shook his shoulder again.

Nursey woke up groaning. When he registered that he was staring at the ceiling, he straightened, grimacing as he did so. Chowder smiled at him sympathetically.

"We should go upstairs," Chowder said. He still hadn't moved.

"Probably," Nursey agreed. He rubbed his shoulder like it pained him with a free hand. His other arm was still strewn across Chowder's shoulders.

"You're getting to be an old man," Dex said just as he stretched. His back popped at least three times.

Nursey quirked an eyebrow at him. "It sounds like you're the old man here."

Chowder groaned, finally having worked up enough energy to move, and rolled onto the floor. His knees and hands hit the gritty wood almost painfully, but it certainly woke him up. He hopped back to his feet, fixing Dex and Nursey with a look.

"I didn't keep you guys here all night, did I?" He asked.

"Nah," Nursey said, cutting Dex off. "I fell asleep watching the movie."

Dex frowned at the interruption but added, "Yeah, it's not like you would have been hard to move."

"Cool," Chowder said. "I glad I didn't trap you. Are you guys gonna shower?"

"You can go first."

They both said it simultaneously. Nursey and Dex both shot each other a look. Chowder made sure to cover his mouth when he smiled. He still needed to brush his teeth.

"We'll wait," Dex said after a moment. He eyed his laptop, which had long since either died or gone into sleep mode.

Normally Chowder would have put up more of a fight, but he did feel pretty gross after sleeping on the couch all night. Maybe Bitty was right about how dirty it was. But Chowder still didn't want to get rid of it. Sleeping on the couch before a game was tradition at this point, though he had to admit that a power nap on the couch was a lot better than a full night's sleep.

It occurred to him that Dex and Nursey had told him to go first because they would just shower together. Or catch up on cuddle time while he was gone because he'd been in the way last night, even if they both said they weren't really dating. The thought made him feel funny in a few different ways, so he tried to brush it off. He rushed the rest of the way through his routine to free up the bathroom faster.

 

 

_Then_

Derek tasted chocolate on the back of his tongue.

He didn't mind, exactly. Chocolate wasn't his number one favorite flavor, but it was certainly high on the list. He just hadn't eaten any recently.

It also felt like there may have been a burn on the tip of his tongue as well and that may have played a part in tasting flavors that shouldn't be there. Last night's dinner had been lasagna, and while it had been fresh out of the oven, he couldn't remember burning his tongue on it.  It wouldn't have been the first time though. So he could at least plausibly believe that much.

What he couldn't believe was how stubbornly the chocolate stuck to his mouth. Even after several glasses of orange juice, the taste didn't fade. He wondered idly if he was still half asleep or if he'd been knocked around the ice one too many times. Elementary school hockey games could get rough.

But his head didn't hurt like he'd been told would happen if he had a concussion, and when he picked _Beloved_ off his mother's shelf, he could read the words as easily as he ever had. So he figured he was probably all right.

It was possibly one of those ASMR things, except he was pretty sure ASMR was a feeling you got because of a sound, not a taste. So maybe it was one of those rare forms of synesthesia instead. Derek was pretty sure he would know if he had synesthesia or not. Or maybe he wouldn't.

Derek turned toward his mother, who sat on the other side of her table reading the newspaper. He didn't know why she did that. She always said the media lied.

"Do I have synesthesia?" He asked.

"Finish your breakfast," she told him.

Derek scooped another spoonful of eggs into his mouth. He probably didn't.

 

 

 

_Now_

"Okay, I think I'm done for now," Chowder announced. He shot a miserable look toward the two different piles of note cards on his bed. One pile was for definitions he'd gotten correct and the other was for those he'd gotten wrong. The second was significantly larger than the first.

"It's been thirty minutes," Dex said. He sat on the bed as well, only a foot away. The note card in his hand read, _What have been the effects of environmental disasters like the BP oil spill on..._ His fingers covered the rest.

"Yeah, but this is really hard," Chowder said. "I'm not really making progress and I have another week anyway. Sorry I took up your time." There had just been so many extra definitions and short answer questions this week he hadn't really had the time to review them all before it was time for his study session with Dex. "Sorry."

"It doesn't bother me." Dex shrugged, dropping the card into the Don't Know pile. "It's your test. If you need to do more on your own first, be my guest."

While Chowder sat cross-legged, only one of Dex's bare feet was curled up on the bed. The other hung off the side, flat on the floor.

"I know," Chowder said, frowning. "I'll study some more before next time, I promise."

Plus, maybe studying in the bedroom had been a bad idea. Next time he would plan for the kitchen or the library or something. Sitting on the bed so close together gave him too many thoughts.

Dex frowned, but he didn't say anything else. He reached forward to scoop up the cards at the same time Chowder did. Their foreheads smacked together. He sucked in a pained breath as Chowder blurted another, "Sorry!"

"It's fine," Dex said, gingerly pulling his hand away from his forehead. He was still frowning, but he didn't look quite as pained as he had a moment before. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Chowder said, but Dex was already pulling his hand away as well. "It's not gonna bruise, right?" He didn't _think_ they'd hit heads hard enough to bruise at least.

"I doubt it," Dex said. He squinted at Chowder's forehead anyway. "Probably not."

"Good."

Then they both seemed to realize Dex was still holding Chowder's hand at the same time. Chowder expected Dex to move away first. _He_ should have dropped Dex's hand first. It was the right thing to do, after all.

But instead of either of those things, they did the opposite. They leaned forward.

For a moment Chowder wished he had taken up Farmer's advice and gotten chapstick for his dry lips, but then he erased that thought because he shouldn't have been kissing Dex in the first place. Even if he and Nursey weren't _technically_ dating.

He should have pulled away then, but Dex's hand had come up to press against the back of his neck. Dex's lips were a little chapped as well, and they caught against Chowder's own. The tiniest bit of red stubble grazed Chowder's cheek. His mouth opened wider in response.

Dex tugged, ever so slightly, and Chowder's lips were tingling as he crawled forward. The space separating their bodies was easily crossed. Dex's other hand gripped the cloth of Chowder's hoodie along the shoulder, and Chowder cupped his jaw with both hands. He remembered the hickey Dex had sported there several weeks ago, the newly healed skin right underneath his fingertips, and _shuddered_. A lick of flame came to life low in his stomach.

There was another rock, a push and pull of moment on top of the dip in the mattress, and Dex fell backwards with Chowder on top of him. Instantly they were pressed flush against each other, and even with Chowder's hands on either side of Dex's head supporting his weight, he could feel the bulge in Dex's pants against his own hip. Everything felt right.

Then Dex lifted his hips slightly and everything felt _good_.

He couldn't help but groan a little into the kiss, nipping at Dex's lower lip once before switching back to sliding his lips against Dex's. Dex ran his fingers along Chowder's side. Most of the note cards had either fallen off the bed or were trapped underneath their bodies, but he didn't particularly care. He doubted Dex did either.

Chowder lowered himself onto his forearms, letting his eyes fall shut. Part of him felt guilty, and that part twisted somewhere in the back of his mind uncomfortably. The rest of him was too focused on the catch in Dex's breath when Chowder rocked his hips.

Dex broke the kiss so they could both breath. Chowder stared at him, catching his breath and taking in how pink Dex's mouth had grown after only a few minutes of kissing. He realized that at some point he had shoved his hand underneath Dex's shirt, palm pressed flat against Dex's toned stomach. His skin felt boiling hot against Dex's.

Dex leaned up and mouthed at the juncture along his neck. Chowder moaned embarrassingly, gasping.

"Fuck," Dex muttered against his skin. Chowder's eyes fell shut at the sound. He was achingly hard in his jeans. His hand traveled farther up Dex's shirt.

There was a nagging feeling pressing against the back of his head, something tingling along his neck. Dex circled his arms around Chowder's torso and flipped them over so that Chowder was now the one on his back. Dex sat back on his thighs, his ass rubbing against Chowder's erection again as he did. He removed his now wrinkled shirt swiftly, and when he reached for the hem of Chowder's sweatshirt to do the same, Chowder let him.

He sat up briefly to allow Dex better access, and when he laid back down, his head was at just the right angle to look at the bathroom doorway. Where Nursey was standing.

Every horrible thing he had been blocking out suddenly hit him all at once and Chowder realized with a jolt what a horrible, awful thing he was doing. He froze instantly, tense enough that he could feel every muscle in his body straining. Above him Dex tensed as well.

Chowder opened his mouth but found he couldn't say anything. He could only stare at Nursey, who leaned against the doorframe casually like he hadn't just caught his maybe-future-boyfriend making out with his other friend. Chowder's skin felt like it was on _fire_ , and he flashed back to the first night he'd woken up to phantom touches dancing across his skin.

"No," Nursey said without prompting, and there was something in his voice that made Chowder freeze for an entirely different reason. Goosebumps rose on his skin. "You should keep going."

Nursey caught his lower lip between his teeth for a moment. Chowder was achingly aware of every moment he made. He didn't want to tear his eyes away. But the coaxing kisses Dex pressed against his now bare shoulder blade demanded attention.

"It's all right," Dex said. "It's all right."

Chowder looked at Dex, hovering above him. Looked at Nursey in the doorway. Swallowed.

"Okay," he said, and though it came out a little breathy, it made Nursey's eyes go sharp. And then Dex was kissing him again, pulling Chowder upright onto his knees, and Chowder couldn't help but giggle a little into Dex's mouth.

A stray _Is this seriously happening_ tugged at his mind before he shoved it away like the rest. When he looked at the doorway again, Nursey was palming himself through his pants. The sight instantly made Chowder moan. Maybe Dex took that as some kind of sign, because suddenly his warm hands were resting against the inside of Chowder's thigh, even though they both still had on their jeans.

Dex kissed open-mouthed in a way that shouldn't have been hot but somehow was. He wrapped an arm around Chowder's waist to pull him closer while his other hand crept closer to Chowder's erection without yet touching it. Chowder desperately wished to relieve some of the pressure in his pants.

"Look at you," Nursey said from the doorway, and Chowder didn't know if he was talking to him or Dex. Maybe both. " _Look_ at you."

If Nursey wanted to watch, it certainly felt like they left him touching himself in the doorway for an eternity while Dex and Chowder got to know each other's bodies. Chowder ran his hands over Dex's arms, his neck, his chest while Dex did the same. He was practically shaking with need when he finally decided enough was enough.

Chowder started to pull away from the kiss, then darted in several times to press his lips against Dex's cheek, his neck, his jaw, before pulling away completely.

"Nursey," he said hoarsely. He fingered the waistband of his jeans. "I think you should really come over here."

Dex made a noise in his throat. His pupils were dilated. In seconds flat, Nursey crossed the room and knelt on the corner of the bed. Chowder thanked the powers that be that Jack had left his old, extra wide mattress behind when he'd graduated instead of letting Chowder bring his single from home.

Nursey tilted Chowder's chin to the side, and Chowder melted into the feel of his hand. Nursey's considerable stubble both scraped and tickled his jaw, and he found a pleasant feeling curling in his chest at the thought that he would have visible marks from it afterward. His heart jumped. He twisted almost completely sideways to press his bare chest against Nursey's clothed one. Dex shuffled sideways to make room.

Nursey pulled back and looked at Chowder, eyes dark. He palmed the erection straining in Chowder's underwear and Chowder's mouth fell open.

"Please," Chowder breathed.

Nursey tugged at the button of his jeans and suddenly the air on Chowder's thighs was much cooler. He smashed their mouths together, and Chowder swallowed the moan that rose up from Nursey's throat. Nursey's lips were considerably smoother than his own.

After a moment of shuffling, Chowder found himself sitting naked in Nursey's equally naked lap. He couldn't remember when they had lost their underwear. Nursey still had his t-shirt on though. Dex was somewhere behind Chowder, further down on the bed. He wanted to turn and look but that would have required tearing his mouth away from Nursey's. The hand on his jaw prevented that anyway.

Nursey's breath was hot, hot, _hot_ on his skin, especially when he pulled back just to gently bite at the skin on his shoulder. Something like déjà vu flashed in Chowder's mind. He quickly forgot it.

One of Nursey's hands crept up Chowder's back and tangled itself in his hair. When he wrapped his free hand around Chowder's dick, Chowder couldn't help the strangled gasp that escaped him.

"Sh—" He swallowed. Nursey's hand on him felt so. So. "Nurse, I'm gonna. If you..."

He couldn't get a sentence out, too caught up in the feel of Nursey's skin against his own. Nursey nodded anyway.

"I've got you," he said, and though his voice made Chowder's dick jump, he slowed down his movements enough so orgasm wasn't completely unavoidable. Still, it was an effort.

Rather than continue pushing past the warning signs, Nursey prolonged the inevitable by trailing tender kisses along Chowder's face, his jaw, his throat. It felt a lot like being worshipped. Chowder's head spun.

There was a low noise behind him, and Nursey didn't stop him when Chowder looked over his shoulder to spot Dex, also naked, watching them with dark eyes and a hand between his legs. He was touching himself, face flushed, heavy breaths, while watching Nursey scrape his stubble against Chowder's neck like it was the hottest thing he'd ever seen in his life. And Chowder _wanted_.

Chowder reached out with a free hand and Dex crossed the space between them. Even still in Nursey's lap, his fingers found purchase along the back of Dex's neck. Their mouths found each other, hot and heavy.

It was much sloppier than their earlier kisses had been, but Dex shuddered and muttered something too low to hear. Nursey's thumb circled the head of his cock, and Chowder gasped into Dex's mouth. His fingers tightened on Dex's neck. Nursey nipped at his earlobe.

Dex looked over Chowder's shoulder, no doubt meeting Nursey's eye, and stiffened all at once. Chowder knew what was happening, but it was hard to focus on the image of Dex coming when Nursey sped up the jerk of his own hand at the same time, twisting his wrist this way and that, bringing stars to Chowder's eyes even without the slick help of lube.

Chowder's hand fumbled between them. His fingers wrapped around Nursey's own hard cock, and they were in synch for a few brief moments before they both came at once. Chowder buried his face in Nursey's shoulder as he did. Nursey's beard prickled against his skin.

The room was quiet for several moments, filled only with the sound of their hurried breathing, before Chowder found his voice.

"Oh, wow," he croaked. "That was... Wow."

Nursey chuckled once. He pressed his lips against Chowder's cheek. Chowder was slowly growing aware of the cooling mess between them.

"Uh," he said, unsure of what to do. He'd never been in this kind of situation before. "I'm gonna grab a towel."

"Good idea," Nursey said. Dex leaned against the wall with his legs pressed together and shot him a thumbs up.

Chowder's skin was still tingling as he slowly peeled himself off of Nursey's lap. They were pretty sweaty, but it wasn't anything they weren't used to from practice. It still wasn't the best feeling though. What _was_ new was the extra moment it took him to find his footing, as well as the layer of electricity that had settled on top of his skin.

He found his boxers and slid them back on before quickly washing himself off in the bathroom. He grabbed two washcloths and dampened those as well before bringing them back out to the bedroom.

When he emerged, Dex and Nursey were more or less in the same position he'd left them in. He liked the sight of them in his bed, but he quickly stifled that thought because he wasn't sure what arrangement was going on here just yet.

Nursey and Dex wiped themselves off with speed and precision that came with experience and slipped their underwear on a well. Instead of leaving, however, they simply sat back down. Dex gestured for Chowder to take a seat as well. He did, wondering what was going to happen next and if he should say anything.

"Hey," Nursey said suddenly, still a little breathless. "You realize we're soulmates, right? All three of us?"

"What?" Chowder said. His skin hadn't stopped tingling. His messy bed sheets barely felt real beneath his fingers.

Dex flicked Nursey in the shoulder. They were both leaning against the headboard, side by side. "Seriously?"

Nursey shrugged.  "I figure it's a now or never moment."

Dex looked at Chowder warily. Nervously.

"Hey," he said but didn't add anything else. He waited.

Chowder blinked. For a moment he was stunned silent. Then he thought about it. He thought about the past few weeks, the touching, the way he always chose Dex and Nursey over everyone else. How he couldn't help but walk up to them the first day they'd met. The doubly cold winters, old news for those on the East Coast. The little spark of energy that lifted to his skin whenever Nursey or Dex touched him. The tingling that was only just now beginning to fade.

"Oh," he said. The knot that had been tangling up in his head for the last month was slowly unraveling.

Nursey raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"

Chowder licked his lower lip. He looked at back at them, the two best looking, greatest friends he'd ever had.

"I'm really dumb," he admitted.

Dex rolled his eyes like that was an understatement. Nursey grinned.

"Only a little," he said. "I was sure you had it figured out a few weeks ago, but then you just brushed it off."

"When?" Chowder asked, trying hard to remember anything that had been out of the ordinary.

"When you were talking about the grade for your first marine biology exam," Dex said.

Chowder was suddenly struck with the realization that they had both figured out the truth at the same time. He wondered if that was why they'd started hooking up in the first place. If they had refused to date because they were waiting on him to get a clue. He made a note to ask about it later.

"Wait," he said. "I remember that day."

Dex raised his eyebrows. "And?"

"Yeah," Chowder continued. "The only thing I can think of that would be weird was when I was leaving the kitchen and—Oh."

"Yeah, _oh_ ," Nursey mimicked, tousling Chowder's hair fondly. Chowder shook his hair back into place, smiling. "You didn't think that was weird then?"

"Sorry!" Chowder said. "I get weird feelings from my soulmates all the time! So I thought it was just the usual stuff, except more tingly. Except I guess that was you guys."

Dex furrowed his eyebrows. "What do you mean all the time?"

Chowder took a deep breath.

"Well," he started. He was glad they were already in bed and that he didn't have any more homework to do for the night. He got the feeling his version of events would take a long time.

It took nearly an hour to start from the earliest instances he could remember and work his way up, answering questions all the while. Dex and Nursey occasionally interrupted with stories from their own childhood that made sense now that they were older, but none of them came close to comparing with Chowder's in intensity or frequency.

Chowder was pretty reluctant to mention the ghost touching at first, but he figured if he couldn't tell his own soulmates, there was nobody he could be honest with. Nursey whistled as he did, and Dex stared at him like he was remembering every time he and Nursey had gotten hot and heavy in the next room.  

"So you're way more sensitive than us," Nursey noted.

If Nursey was the middle ground for testing sensitivity, Chowder thought all the conversation had so far proven that Dex was a near zero and he himself closer to one hundred. It was a pretty big gap between them. And yet it had been Dex and Nursey who had recognized the signs way before he did. Go figure.

"You're telling me you got off just about every night since Nursey and I started fucking and you _didn't_ think there was some kind of connection there?" Dex asked incredulously.

Chowder shrugged, embarrassed. "Honestly, I was trying _not_ to think about it. Sorry."

Dex shook his head. He took a deep breath. "I mean, it worked out, I guess. But still."

Nursey cocked an eyebrow at him.

"I'd say it more than worked out."

"I mean," Dex started. "Yeah, obviously."

"Obviously?" Nursey teased.

"You aren't awful," Dex admitted, looking pointedly away. His face was red. Nursey elbowed him.

"Who knew you were secretly a sap," Nursey said. Dex's blush only grew. He mumbled something under his breath and didn't protest when Nursey dragged him closer. Chowder smiled.

That was when it really hit him. Here he'd been trying to stay away from the two best people knew because they were together, and they'd been the people he had been looking for the whole time.

His younger self had been right. He really was the luckiest guy in the whole world.

**Author's Note:**

> This was so long I almost considered writing some kind of commentary version as well. I have lots of comments about little things and reasonings why characters do stuff that I just didn't/couldn't spell out in the text for whatever reason, so sometimes that stuff is implied. If you have a question at all, feel free to hmu at my tumblr (http://someobscurereference.tumblr.com/) or in the comments below. I promise I love talking to people.
> 
> This is the second longest thing I've ever written and I wrote it in like two weeks once I actually got started. Wow.
> 
> Also, shoutout to TheUnvanquishedZims for leaving such a long comment on the last section. It super motivated me and I kept it open in my tabs for like a week while writing this. Thank you.


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